A common question/greeting is "How are you doing?"  Most of the time the question is rhetorical, but a lot of people do genuinely want to know.  I honestly do not know what to say or how to answer people right now.  Communication of such deep emotions and hurt is hard, even if the other person has an idea of what I am feeling.  Fortunately, I do not have to always come up with the words all by myself.  Scripture helps a lot.  I feel the pain and lost of Job, but the fire and drive of Paul.  Songs have said a lot to me too.  I have always listened to the lyrics of music and its meaning.  There is a group called Sanctus Real that really answers "How am I doing" the best (please understand I still see and feel God's goodness):

 If weakness is a wound

That no one wants to speak of

Then "cool" is just how far we have to fall

I am not immune

I only want to be loved

But I feel safe behind the firewall

Can I lose my need to impress?

If you want the truth, I need to confess

I'm not alright

I'm broken inside, broken inside

And all I go through

It leads me to you, it leads me to you

Burn away the pride

Bring me to my weakness

Until everything I hide behind is gone

And when I'm open wide

With nothing left to cling to

Only you are there to lead me on

Cause honestly, I'm not that strong

I'm not alright

I'm broken inside, broken inside

And all I go through

It leads me to you, it leads me to you

And I move, and I move, and I move...closer to you

And I move, and I move, and I move...closer to you

And I move, and I move, and I move...closer to you

And I move, and I move, and I move...

I'm not alright

I'm broken inside, broken inside

broken inside, broken inside

And all I go through

Leads me to you, leads me to you

I'm not alright, I'm not alright, I'm not alright...that's why I need you